I have mixed feelings about New Year's resolutions. I know that the majority of people are not successful at keeping up with their resolution, which leads to them feeling often more discouraged and believing less in themselves.
It can be difficult to resist an
opportunity to use the New Year
as a little extra motivation to do
something you have been wanting to do.
If you are working on creating some change in your life, it can be helpful to do it in the smartest way possible, that is a good match for you. As with all things, different things work for different people. If your best friend might be able to just set her mind to something and chip away at it, while you are toiling over not staying committed to yourself, don't beat yourself up about it. Your friend might fit into a slim category of people who are known as upholders, according to writer Gretchen Rubin.
Rubin's framework is called the Four Tendencies, and puts people into one of four categories when creating behavior change:
Upholder: “I do what others expect of me—and what I expect from myself.”
Questioner: “I do what I think is best, according to my judgment. If it doesn’t make sense, I won’t do it.”
Obliger: “I do what I have to do. I don’t want to let others down, but I may let myself down.”
Rebel: “I do what I want, in my own way. If you try to make me do something—even if I try to make myself do something—I’m less likely to do it.”
The most common type of person is the obliger. It makes sense when you think about advice about trying to make a change, ranging from gym buddies to Alcoholics Anonymous. If you are unsure of which type you are, Rubin has a self-test on her website.
Understanding ourselves better can always help us do things smarter, right?